I spend a lot of time in my head. Just now I was thinking about whether I should post more than one thing in a day, because that's not good blogging protocol. You don't want to post everything at once right? Because there will eventually be a moment when you can't or don't want to write something new.
...back to being in my head. I think I get to a point sometimes when I've reached my capacity for acting in the way that is most responsible, especially to other folks. I get lost in my head and waste away hours I should be using to do other things. That's not particularly fair to my husband, children, friends, etc., but its a cycle I find myself repeating.
What I should be doing takes up so much room in my mind that I flee instead of fighting. It feels and is experienced as selfish, but its my truth in the moment.
My goal is to be authentically me, the challenge is to be true to my desires without rejecting all obligations to others. The trouble is so much of the time it feels as if I'm not a good enough mother, wife, entrepreneur, community member, sister, friend, daughter, etc. that when I'm actually not doing well at those jobs I find it hard to see where the tipping point was.
Specifically which obligations are important and which only seem as such?